taik's Diaryland Diary

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Jordan

Did I ever mention I met a guy from OkCupid in person? I can't remember. Well, I did. He lives in Wichita and he messaged me through the site stating that I was interesting. I replied back and we flirted a bit via messages. One night he did come from Wichita to meet me. I was extremely nervous and hoping that my breath didn't smell too bad because I was at my friend's graduation party and had one beer. I chewed a lot of gum and passed on the chocolate cake. My friends were telling me that it would be alright and that he'd like me. Well, he arrived and we talked for a bit, nervous chatter. Eventually, everyone left except for Jordan (the guy), Meagan, Christian, and myself. We then went to IHOP. Most of us didn't eat but sat around and talked some. They dropped Jordan and I back at his borrowed vehical and went. Meagan didn't want to leave me with him, it was nice to know she was concerned. :) I said it would be alright and went anyway.
We drove around, stopping at a gas station and proceeded on to my house. It was a lengthy drive but fine. I didn't say much because I really didn't know what to say.
We arrived at my house and I told him that I didn't think it was a good idea for him to go inside. Why? Because I knew that one of the junior staff girls would be working and it would look bad, for me to invite in a guy they didn't recognize and it being so late at night. He didn't seem too bothered by it. So, we talked a bit more, he made me uneasy when he said he saw something out in the field that didn't look like an animal. It seemed to me that on the drive over there he kept trying to inch his elbow closer to my arm on the arm rest. Later when we were parked he did start to hold my hand. He leaned over and kissed me, several times. It moved even further, to the back seat. Since he told me he was a virgin I felt it was a good idea (and with the way things were progressing) that I tell him I was not a virgin. He said he didn't care. Still, it made me uncomfortable to think that if he was going to push for things to go further I didn't want to be the one to take it from him, it was too soon for me. So, I stopped it before I felt it would be too far. Still, I was ashamed. I finally said good night after 4:00am. He had to drive back to Wichita.
I've seen him twice after that, and this time I've made sure that people are around (also, we haven't been alone at night again).
The other day he told me online that someone else was interested in him. He felt bad about it, I could understand, but I'm not worried about it. I really don't see much between us, he's nice and that's fine, but it isn't something that should decide on whether or not we date. I didn't see much else in common between us.

4:17 a.m. - 2006-05-26

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